omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
Threw a lawn chair at the neighboors dog. I think I killed him. Come here and assess this
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Just played slippy cup. Flip cup plus slip n slide. What did you do with your fourth of july?
"YOU A2TE UNDERAGE LOL" Got that at 2am. Gotta stop dating alcoholics.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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