Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
My life has become a never ending game of 'illegal or just frowned upon?'
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Randomize
