She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Your brother's naked in the courtyard again. Just a head's up.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
Randomize
