Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Well my dad thinks I wake up at 3 or 4 am every day. Really it is just all the booty calls, but I'm glad he thinks I am so motivated
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I just asked her to come in through the window, this pretty much solidifies the whole fuck-buddy thing...
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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