your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Best porno line to date...."drinks are on me..." while she female ejaculates into a wine chalice
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
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