So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
you're surprised the chick that fucked you for a free cup has herpes. i don't feel bad for you.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
You are the tramp this city needs, but not the one it deserves.
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I’ll call you later. There’s a jilted trophy wife looking for a revenge fuck at my door
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