I think he was having a seizure but nobody knew because 'what is love' was playing
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
We didn't have a blender for the margaritas, so she tried to use the garbage disposal and wasted half a handle of my grandpa's good tequila.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I respect the size of her balls.
Yeah but I don't respect the size of her anything else.
Whoa, I am aware of WAY too many squirrels right now...
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Nothing makes me prouder to be liberal and socialist than the idea of desecrating the memory of Ronald Reagan
Randomize
