Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I can't wait to get home and drunk cuddle your dog
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
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