Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
my roommate just showed up covered in dirt, drunk....with a whole ice cream cake that says "it's a girl".
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
She's just so happy...and so naked.
i got to hold a baby today and i loved it and i want a baby but actually i'm going to make an appointment to get birth control now.
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
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