she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
If you wondered to yourself today, "did Sarah break her bathing suit strap and flash a pool full of children," the answer is yes.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Our relationship needs a sober moment
I'll call you when that happens
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
how does someone with a Masters Degree leave poop in an ashtray in the sink? It just blows my mind
Tonight I plan on passing out fully clothed on the table. I don't know where normal people plan on sleeping.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
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