Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I've decided to bang my pen-pal.
Nothing says "I love you" like a full raw dog.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
you know what scares the shit out of me? i have eaten bagel bites since i was a little kid and just in the past five years they started puting "made with real cheese" WHAT THE FUCK WERE THEY USING BEFORE? i mean ive been a bagel biter since the womb
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
I don't even know if I LIKE sober sex any more.
Why do I have the 4 of hearts in my bra?
Haha we got sick of drinking on 4 is for whores so we stole the cards...I woke up with three of them in mine
drunken problem solving at its finest
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
Randomize