yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
I have a pussy blister if you wanna poke at it with a needle tomorrow...by this text i realize just how strange our relationship is, especially because you're probably excited
I think you mean your blister is filled with pus...atleast i hope
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
If drawing me a picture of his dick in draw something is flirting then he is doing it wrong.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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