question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize
