i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
he convinced the breakfast vendor to melt twix bars on bacon for me at 4am. he slurred every word. i think i found my prince charming.
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Literally sucked a dick for ten seconds before I said to myself, this tiny ass penis isn't worth it. My night last night
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
