apparently farting at a cop is considered assault.
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
She was blacklisted from the Uhaul center...what the fuck do you have to do to get blacklisted from a Uhaul center
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spent 30 minutes cleaning out my coleman grill. Did you really have to have grilled yogurt?
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
So i stood up out of the sunroof while he gave me oral. Car was still moving. Exactly how illegal is that?
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Guy running next to me at the gym is judging me. I think he can smell the whiskey leaking out of my pores.
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