Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
half way down the stairs my legs said fuck this and i just fell the rest of the way...
Randomize