hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
You don't have asthma, your pregnant
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
I've started drunk signing up for 5ks. Who even does that?
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
I think my moral compass just broke
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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