I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
I think as far as last words to bitter ex girlfriends go, "enjoy that staph infection youre about to get in your uterus" is right up there with the best
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Either that or he's gagged in a strangers trunk right now.
Well I suppose either way he's learning a pretty tough lesson right now.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Randomize
