too bad you live with your parents still
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
You're the end to all my bad dreams.
Did you have that reoccuring dream about me banging your mom again?
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
while you were getting the key to the dorm from the lobby i was giving a drunk monolog to the security camera about my life
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
i was mowing the lawn and found the coffee pot in the bushes
I'm pretty sure I just had a convo with my hot pockets about how they weren't good enough for the oven.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
I woke up this morning and the lid to the back of my toilet was missing. Dahfaq do I do with this shit?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
Randomize
