Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Watching the dude who probably knocked me up be all cute with his girlfriend on my couch. I am too nice, and I hate today.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
