my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Pretty certain he passed out for a while going down on me. Absolutely certain he passed out during the blow job.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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