I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He somehow obtained a megaphone and managed to scare away the out-of-control house party—the house party that HE started, by the way— by pretending to be the police.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
hot take: drunk me can walk through walls?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize