you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
we need to drink 2009 down the drain
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
What's the appropriate way to phrase "If you ever leave your wife give me a call. But we can still have sex periodically until then."??
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
it is a dangerous dangerous place where morals and dignity go to die and all your fantasies about men become reality.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Why are there naked heterosexuals in my apartment?
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