I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Everything is bigger in Texas. Including Colt's vagina.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
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