That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
You were telling the cab driver that you believe in him and just to follow his dreams
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I just want nice things and good sex
If you think you're having a bad day, know that upon waking up, I was informed that I blew my nose in a piece of bread last night
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
Randomize
