he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
I'm with some lesbians. Somehow I offended them and the Justin Beiber one told me I was fat.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
I think I offered a man a blowjob for his power ranger suite last night...
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
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