Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I'm currently imdbing Helena Bonham Carter to see if there are any pictures of her that don't scare the crap out of me.
Good luck with that.
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
Randomize
