i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I'm eating all of the evidence.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
That guy drinking savagely was actually at his buddy's gay bachelor party in the male stripper section. He came over to the chicks side so we drank with him.
He had some sort of penis-related post traumatic stress disorder, but body shots seemed to wake him up
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Thanks for listening. You're the first guy I've ever worked with who I didn't want to fuck.
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
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