this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
I bought beer tonight and got 3 coupons with my receipt. Paper towels, laundry detergent, and Advil. I wonder if Stop & Shop predicts the future or just does this with every beer purchase.
I thought that since they were twins... they would be equally as good in bed
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Just witnessed my roommate pick her nose and eat it in her sleep. Remember, you made out with that.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
he asked me if i wanted to hook up & my answer was 'why not'. he came in thirty seconds and the condom broke. it's the love story of the century
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
