oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
he said verbatim, he wants to "bang you hard".
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
i got home safe but then alex started a fire so now we're at the hospital
I thought I'd never say this, but if I had to choose between these cookies and sex, it would be these cookies
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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