my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I queefed so loud it echoed.
Well I put her head right through the headboard. Thank god the room was under her name.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
He told us when he was 10 he started shoving bars of soap up his ass for pleasure so i winked at him
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