no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I honestly don't understand how your night went from singing a touching rendition of Africa to an angry political rant to low key trying to find a frat boy to bang to doing dishes to yoga
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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