I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
A total of 95 cents was stuck to my ass the next morning.
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize
