Oh just a soda. I'm "driving"
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
i told him my stretch marks were scars from a jellyfish sting........he totally bought it
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
They don't allow McDonald's in the ER. Go figure
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
i asked the cop if we could stop and do a chinese firedrill.... he said no.
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
Randomize
