I think scott just propositioned me for sex
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
I just found a bottle of gin in my vegetable crisper. Party is back on.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Could have had sex with an ex NFL kicker last night.
That would've been embarrassing.
Just from watching vine I come to conclusion that all pornstars are dog hoarders.
Successful first night. Lost my phone. Front desk found it. Earthquake in wine country. Didn't feel it.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
So Saturday night after 10 drinks I guess he tried to have sex with me and in the middle of it I asked "can you tell I'm faking it!?" and then I sat up and threw up in my hand. That's a sex Win in my books
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Randomize
