nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I skipped work to stalk him.
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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