Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook
my drunk uncle just explained that turkeys are not gentle lovers... and no context doesn't make it better.
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
somehow a sneeze triggered me puking over everyone in the car
Oh you have the munchies, Dad? That's great and congratulations on the weed but STOP EATING MY APPLE PIE
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
Randomize
