How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
Life Lesson Number 76: Masturbating into a sock is useless if there is a hole in it.
If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
I remember doing shots of gin, then I have this strange memory of us making out in the womens room at waffle house.
I regret none of it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
I was super naked---except I kept my shoes on, because I'm a lady, and I was bent over a bar.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
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