it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i was taking a dump when this random girl ran in, puked all over my lap, then passed out on the floor
did you bang her?
seriously?
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
WHY didn't you stop me from ordering $900 worth of socks last night when I was very obviously judgement impaired at the time?!?!
How is it that on the one day I'm just moving my car at 6:30 I get the walk of shame looks but when I come home at 9 am in a torn dress holding heels old ladies smile at me?
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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