idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Your lack of dedication to alcohol is forcing me to drink with my ex husband. U suck
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Oh my god he's laying on a longboard singing the song from cool runnings.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
all I know is this drummer better stop eye fucking me while he plays cowbell. it is way too early for that.
so much tequila, so little girl.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
Randomize
