There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
he ate 15 dinner rolls and nothing else. then took a shit in the bathroom came out and blamed it on his dad. i wish i was 8.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Can someone please remind me later tonight that there's a taco in my purse. I may get drunk and forget I put it there
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
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