Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
I will suppress my appetite by doing shots then passing out
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Don't do shots out of Tostitos scoops.
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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