If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
It's summer and yet I still can't have one library session w/o seeing someone who has had their penis in me.
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
I had to run home with my hands covering my tits this morning. How does this keep happening?
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
Pooping with Eye of the Tiger playing. Not a single fuck shall be given.
Have you ever wanted to murder the Sun? To bring the life-giving fusion reactor to a bitter end because of the sheer agony it brings to your eyes as it keeps you awake. And for waking the birds. Fuck birds.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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