after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Our Icelandic basketball player brought cocaine and rachael is screaming that he should do lines off her stomach. It's that kind of party
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I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
id like to think im the only pot dealing prostitute that is also an ordained minister. but maybe not. what a time to be alive
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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