I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Look, all I'm sayin is $2 boilermakers and an expense account are probably a bad mix…
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
When I said to shut up, I meant it. I'm sorry you have a bald spot now, but it was necessary.
If court goes my way we are flying to Vegas.
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
That's a lot of judgement coming from a man wearing a dress made from a bedsheet.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
Randomize
