I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I love how my cats smell like pot.
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
Lord give me the strength to not check my tinder messages at my grandmother's wake.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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