So how was he last night?
Five-minute foot-long.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
listen if there's one thing I'm asking of you tonight is that you buy me a cow for my farmville.
Tell me you're stoned. It's 2:40am.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Dude, she got on top of me, grumbled in a low voice "I'm going to make you remember me", and then farted.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
Get here now. There’s a guy dressed as Captain Morgan handing out miniature bottles of Captain Morgan.
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
