Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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