bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
You planned my entire going away party sitting in the bath tub cradling a bottle of Cuervo. You promised me fire jugglers. And a pinata.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Feels like I ran a marathon last night. A tequila marathon.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
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