I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
So you threw a sword at me last night
I honestly wish I could say that I was surprised.
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
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