what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Yup. Dog walker, house sitter and mistress to the rich, bored and bi-curious. I've got a nice little operation running.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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