i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I feel like I hate him but his dick too bomb to hate completely
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
he was the first penis i touched… i have to go to his shitty bands first gig, i mean come on now
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
He had a small dick and screamed "I will kill you if you don't get hard" to it in German...awkward time to have to explain I speak German too...
This is why you need to stop sleeping with freshmen.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
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