i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
An outback commercial just played and I remembered that guy from Australia Imade out with at the Derby. Great Bachelorette Party, btw.
She has a tattoo on her inner thigh that's an x with a long dotted line. So after she passed out I signed it. Dunno what else I was supposed to do...
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
I would not recommend douching while drunk.
Let's not share with anyone else in the apartment of how we simultaneously peed in the kitchen sink last night.....
Randomize
